My streak of dead electronic devices continues, my Braun electric razor died. As I contemplated the replacement of yet another expensive machine, I came to a realization: I am glad it died. My old Braun Synchro razor must be at least 10 years old, the battery wouldn’t hold a charge anymore, and the motor was weak, and finally it completely stopped working. So I replaced it with the new Braun Activator with a self-cleaning base station. Oh boy is it nice, electric razor technology has come a long way in the last 10 years.
And that is what lead me to an epiphany about all this broken machinery. I usually buy expensive, top of the line products, under the assumption that quality products last longer and tend to be cheaper over the long term. But get a good return on your investment, you have to keep them a long time. All my recently-dead products lived a good long life, and proved me right. But there is one thing you don’t get when you operate this way: the latest technology. And now it is obvious to me, I haven’t really bought any serious new products in over a decade. So it is nice to get back up on top with shiny new machines, they work so much better than the old ones did (even when the old ones were new). I hope the new machines last as long as the old ones!
Category: General
Dead TiVo
My beloved Sony SVR-2000 TiVo is dead. Well, not quite dead, but for all practical purposes, it’s dead. The early Series 1 TiVos have a notorious problem, the modem circuit dies and then it can’t phone home for program schedules. Without program schedules, it can’t record the programs you want. Everything works except the modem, so it can still record and play back, it just doesn’t know what to record or when to record it. So without a modem, a TiVo is totally useless.
Fortunately, there is a solution. Some TiVo hackers sell a circuit board you can add into the box, it gives you an ethernet port so you can get the program schedules directly over the internet. I’ve resisted making any upgrades to my TiVo since it was working fine, but I guess now I don’t have any choice. I was hoping to make this machine last until the new HDTV TiVos shipped in a year or so, maybe I can do the repair and stretch it out a little longer. I really do not want to buy a new TiVo right now.
My TiVo only has 3 days of programming schedules left, so on Monday, I’ll have to get on the phone, order the ethernet upgrade, and have it shipped overnight so I can get it installed before the schedules run out. What could possibly go wrong with that plan?
Goosefoot
I have goosefoot. I have heard of pigeon toes and crow’s feet, but I never heard of goosefoot. No, my foot doesn’t resemble a goose’s foot. Goosefoot is a condition named after a group of three tendons in the knee that vaguely resembles a goose’s foot. It is more correctly known as Pes Anserinus Bursitis. And it hurts like hell!
The really stupid thing is, I did this to myself. I went power-walking for 30 minutes almost every day, without enough days off to allow my tendons to recover. So my knee tendons are inflamed and extremely painful even when I am sitting completely idle. Even worse, there is basically no treatment, there is not even any effective pain medication, I just have to grit my teeth and wait for it to subside on its own.
After finally getting an appointment an orthopedic specialist a mere two weeks after the intense pain began, I was informed that if I stay off my feet, I might be able to walk without pain in 6 to 8 weeks. I was also told that if my condition doesn’t improve rapidly in a few more days (which is extremely unlikely) I’ll have to be on crutches for a month or more. This totally sucks. And I have only myself to blame.
Warning: Quitting Smoking Can Be Hazardous To Your Knees
If the Surgeon General had my best interests in mind, he would have issued a warning: quitting smoking can be hazardous to your knees. I quit smoking, and in the process, ruined one of my knees. I am in absolute agony.
A few months ago, I decided to quit smoking. It wasn’t easy, but it could have been a lot worse. I used the nicotine patch, it went well but I gained about 10 pounds. Then due to some stressful events, I caved in and started smoking again. I went through all the trials of quitting and had nothing to show for it except the extra pounds.
So I decided to get more serious about quitting. I figured that the only way to succeed would be to exercise to avoid the weight gain. I went on the patch again, but this time it was absolutely horrible. One of the rare side-effects of using the patch is insomnia, sometimes I couldn’t sleep for days on end. I finally got a prescription for some sleeping pills, they helped a little, but not enough. I was absolutely frazzled. But finally I got through it, and I could begin an exercise routine.
Back when I was a teenager, the new rage in exercise was Ken Cooper’s Aerobics, and I followed it religiously. I had a racing bicycle and I used to ride 20 miles each way to high school from my house out in the country. I had great motivation to do the program and document it, I was allowed to skip Phys Ed classes, so I didn’t have to mix with the jocks or the obnoxious Phys Ed teacher. I got in really good shape, the best shape of my life. I had occasional thoughts of becoming a bicycle racer, way back when Lance Armstrong was in diapers, and nobody ever heard of the sport. I finally gave up bicycling when I moved to Los Angeles where cars and bikes do not mix. This was vividly proven when a neighbor swiped my bike and was hit by a car, turning my beautiful racing bike into a pretzel.
The distinctive feature of the Aerobics program is that it progresses very slowly since it was designed for sedentary middle-aged men who were completely out of shape and on the verge of a heart attack. You are supposed to progress very slowly so you don’t have a heart attack or injure yourself from over-exercise. When I was a teenager, I wondered how anyone could get so out of shape that they could only safely walk 15 minutes a day. But now that I am a sedentary middle-aged man, I completely understand. It doesn’t happen intentionally, it creeps up on you slowly without you even noticing it.
I decided to start with a low-impact swimming program, since I live across the street from my city’s indoor pool. I got in about 4 weeks of swimming, then suddenly school started and the local swim teams started monopolizing the pool, I could never get in to do laps. So much for that idea.
I decided to do it the hard way, running. Running gives you the most benefit in the shortest duration, but it is hard on your legs and ankles (especially if you’re 6ft2in and 250lbs like me). I am not built for running, so I took all possible precautions. I got some really great running shoes, and expensive custom orthotics. I tested them out and the new technology was really great, it wasn’t nearly as stressful on my legs as I expected.
The classic Aerobics running program starts with a slow 12 week progression of slow walking at increasing distances before you even start to jog, let alone start running. I started in early autumn, it looked like I had just enough time to get up to running speed before winter set in. I wanted to get up to speed before the coldest weather set in, so I could keep warm from my own body heat. But I got a late start, I spent a few more weeks on the patch than I expected, so now winter was here and I had to go out walking in temperatures as low as -10F. That was no fun at all, but I suppose it was better than exercising in sweltering summer temperatures.
Of course I didn’t think I was in as bad a shape as the Aerobics program expected, so I pushed harder than the routine suggested. When it said I should walk 1 mile every other day, I did 2 miles. Then I increased to 6 days a week instead of 3 days a week. I was pushing hard, but I seemed to be making good progress. I exercised for 6 weeks before I lost a single pound, then suddenly I lost 4 pounds in one week. The program was starting to work, even if my legs were taking a beating. I was really motivated, I got an iPod and walked along to tunes by The Donnas, there is nothing quite so motivational as being taunted by teenage girls. I kicked it up a notch from 15 minute walking miles to 13 minute miles with 2 minutes of light jogging per mile. Then one day I was out walking in a straight line, in the home stretch, and my right knee began aching. It seemed only mildly painful, so I figured I’d take the next day off.
I woke up the next day and I could barely stand up, my knee was so painful. I didn’t think I injured it, I was just going in a straight line, I didn’t torque or twist it, I didn’t fall, so I figured it was just a strain and it would go away after a few days. But it didn’t. The New Year’s holiday was approaching, I figured if it didn’t heal after a week, I’d go to the doctor. I spent a week in agonizing pain, and then went in to the ER on Jan 2, figuring the doctors would be back from the holidays (I forgot that Jan 2 was a Monday and a holiday, oops). They took some wonderful X-Rays of my knee and declared the bone structure was in perfect shape, no fractures, no arthritis, not even any signs of wear and tear. But an X-Ray can’t see the ligaments and cartilage, and the orthopedics clinic was still closed for the holidays. I made an appointment, which is still a whole week away. They gave me a stupid splint to immobilize my whole leg, and prescribed 3x the normal dosage of ibuprofen, which is almost 90% of a toxic dosage. It’s not doing much for the pain, but I can tell when it wears off so it must be doing something. I was kind of hoping for better meds.
I decided to backtrack and see where I went wrong. I used the original Cooper Aerobics program, the same book I used as a kid. It calculates each activity by “Aerobics Points” and you need to do a minimum of 30 points per week to improve your fitness. You start out doing 5 points and work your way up to 30 points over several months. I looked around Dr. Cooper’s website, and found out that they had recalculated the entire point system. I thought I was doing the recommended 20 points a week, but I was already doing 30 points. Oops. No wonder I got injured.
Now I have a setback of at least a couple weeks, maybe even months. Worst case I might need knee surgery, best case I need to rest for several weeks. I can’t even get in to see the doctor for another week. Now I’m back to where I started from, and probably worse.
If I have to start over from square one, I’m going to do things right this time. I should have gotten a stationary bicycle with a built-in heart rate monitor. I looked at some used models before I began, but decent bikes start around $700. Besides, I want to move back to California in a month or two, and that would just be another expensive bulky item to move. So once I get relocated, I’m going to get a stationary bike, and I can get my aerobics points without pounding my feet on the pavement.
2006: Year of the Dog
Each year I make a nice Japanese-style New Year’s card for my blog. However, it is traditional to not send a card when there has been a recent tragedy, such as a death in the family. So I apologize for the absence of a handmade card this year. Perhaps next year I will be able to resume this tradition.
A Lesson in Time Management
Goal Displacement is one of my mildly neurotic problems with getting things done. The classic example of Goal Displacement is a writer who has to sharpen all his pencils perfectly before he can start writing. And today I encountered a classic example that should serve as an object lesson for everyone.
Today I was listening to an audio tape on Time Management. I was doing multiple things at once while listening to the tape, surfing the web, sorting mail, paying some bills, etc. So I felt like I was getting a lot done, I was multitasking even while taking a lesson on improving my time management. But the lecturer insisted that my activity was not actually productive, I was mistaking activity for progress, and I must learn to focus on what things are most important in my life, which the lecturer insisted is learning his time management methods. And then the lecturer posed a few questions that I must stop and ponder, and write down the answers, so I thought I’d take it seriously, pause, and write down my answers.
So I grabbed my favorite fountain pen, and started writing. But something was wrong, the pen was clogged up. Of course I could have picked up some other pen or pencil, but this was my favorite pen, and if it gets clogged up, it gets worse if it dries out, so I needed to fix it right away. I pulled out a tissue and squeezed the nib, there were little dots of ink on the tissue, so there was some ink left in the pen. But I couldn’t get the ink to flow. I went to the bathroom and ran the nib under hot water, ink was definitely coming out, it’s writing a little better but still not working right. OK, I guess I’ll have to put in a new ink cartridge, but where the hell did I put them? I bought a little 3-pack of ink refills when I bought this pen, but they were packed away when I moved a few months ago and I haven’t seen them since. I had to search through a few boxes of junk to locate them. I inserted a new ink cartridge, it took a bit of work, another rinse under hot water, a couple minutes scribbling on waste paper, but now the ink is flowing. Ah, there is nothing like the feel of writing with a good fountain pen, even if they are tempermental sometimes.
After spending 15 minutes trying to get my pen to write, I completely forgot what I was supposed to write. I even took another 15 minutes to write this little story, and I still haven’t gotten back to the lecture. I think I was supposed to write down some things I did this week that I thought were urgent but really were not important.
Dear Neighbor:
It appears that you, Mrs. Neighbor, do not quite understand how to work with a common resource like this apartment building’s laundry facility. Permit me to offer a suggestion that will make life easier for everyone who shares these washers and driers.
Be sure to remove all foreign objects from your laundry before running it through the washer and drier. In particular, you should NOT run these items through the drier AGAIN:
Hawkeye Rapist Pierre Pierce Imprisoned
Rapist Pierre Pierce performed his perp walk today, as he was hauled to prison in shackles. Like all Hawkeye criminals, Rapist Pierce escaped the maximum penalty of 56 years for his crimes, and will serve a maximum of 2 years in the Sex Offender unit of the Iowa State Prison in Mt. Pleasant.
Rapist Pierce will now be locked up with his peers: sexual deviants, violent thugs, and gangsters. I am sure that he will find he has much in common with his new roommates. But be careful in the shower, Rapist Pierce, don’t drop that soap!
Now the waiting begins, who will be the next Hawkeye Thug to be arrested for a felony? The local university newspaper The Daily Iowan reports that 11% of Hawkeye Athletes have been convicted of at least a misdemeanor crime. They will have to work harder to live up to the reputation of their teams. Who will step forward and uphold the high standard of the felonious Hawkeye Rapists and Thugs?
I Hate Rebates
I am getting rather irritated at manufacturers that seek the flimsiest of pretenses to deny my rebates. I lost $150 in rebates in the last 2 months. But this one takes the cake, it is not just an insulting way to reject my rebate, it is a Federal crime.
Cingular didn’t just screw me out of my $50 rebate, it also screwed the US Post Office out of 37 cents.
If Only It Was True..
Here is an advertisement I encountered during a recent Google search.
The last Stradivarius that went up for sale fetched over $2 million at Christie’s in New York.